The Last Man, Just A Guy

Post-Pac Man Apocalypse

Variations of the phrase “The Last Man” have been used by Nietzsche (to describe the weak-willed anti-superman), as the moniker for Vincent Price’s character in the 1964 film The Last Man on Earth (later reprised by Will Smith in I Am Legend), and now for the Sony Computer Entertainment’s PS3 game The Last Guy.

The title is satisfyingly cryptic, evoking the kind of ultimate of ultimates that make hero-driven narratives so compelling. Though the game was released a few months back, the structure has been unjustly under-appreciated. Focus, people! This game features a cape-clad hero (really, is there any better kind of hero?) running around real cities (thanks to Google Maps) while trying to save survivors from zombies (PURPLE zombies!).

The music features the kind of twinkling digitalizations that make me proud to be a child of the ’80s, while the graphics are more in tune with their Pac-Man-for-the-21st-century simplicity. The game is equally straightforward: gather up as many blob-like people as you can without running into zombies, alien creatures, or out of time on the clock. It sounds pretty basic, but the combination of real world satellite images and otherworldly aggressors gives it a World War Z meets Choose Your Own Adventure feel.

Watching The New Watchmen Trailer

Spot on

Now that the excitement over the new Watchmen trailer has died down a little, I think we can all agree that it looks amazing. Check out the panel-perfect shots, gravely voice over for Rorschach, and even the Mars sequence with Dr. Manhattan and Laurie Jupiter. The casting is clearly spot-on (except for Matthew Goode as Ozymandius—I’m still not sold on the effeminate Brit for the role), and the stylization, while more techno-shiny than I’d expected, is a perfect parody of other big budget comic book movies. If you’re still salivating for more, remember to check out Dave Gibbons’ behind-the-scenes book.

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Sci-Fi-O-Rama

No Dr. Manhattan in here

If you’re in the mood for some nostalgia-inducing art, check out Sci-Fi-O-Rama, a blog that features out of print covers, rare sketches, and gorgeous graphics from the expansive and varied world of science fiction storytelling.

Expect to find art by Dean Ellis, Colin Hay, and Roman Cieslewicz, along with unexpected gems like Karel Thole’s commissioned work for Italian sci-fi mag Urania and Alejandro Jodorowsky’s setches for a never-made Dune movie.

Sexiest Monster Undead

Mama wants a hug.

Werewolves have never had the onscreen sex appeal of their vampire brethren. Sure, Ginger Snaps did well with its scantily clad protagonists and Blood and Chocolate featured the perpetually broody-eyed Olivier Martinez, but both movies were cursed by their self-knowing sexuality.

The issue has been further compounded by the over-hyped Underworld movies, which cast werewolves as the bestial foil to those statuesque bloodsuckers. According to producer Len Wiseman (aka Mr. Kate Beckinsale), Underworld 3: Rise of the Lycans is going to change all that with its hackneyed Romeo and Juliet subplot and historical epic-ness.

Or not.

Check out the trailer below:

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Simpsons Meet Superman

ThunderCats - HO!

Bringing new meaning to the term “fan art,” Springfield Punx is a blog that features Simpsons-style animations of comic book heroes, TV characters, and a miscellany of other dorktastic figures.

The site’s resident cast includes popular icons (Batman, Lion-O) and overlooked favorites (Harley Quinn, Electro), all of which are rendered with the loving detail of a true fanboy.

The site is updated fairly regularly so check back often for primary color-hued interpretations of your favorite fictional characters.

Joe Johntson To Direct Captain America, Save World

Captain America has been raised from the dead—on screen, at least. Marvel Studios has just announced that Joe Johntson will direct First Avenger: Captain America, which is set for a May 6, 2011 release date.

Johnston was an early pioneer of comic book-to-film adaptations, having directed The Rocketeer in the early ’90s, while also counting bizarro family film Honey, I Shrunk the Kids and the franchise-happy Jurassic Park III among his previous efforts. Oh, and he won an Oscar for Best Visual Affects for Raiders of the Lost Ark. If that’s not sufficient street cred then I don’t know what it.

Sexploitation: Sci-Fi Style

If you haven’t seen Zack and Miri Make a Porno you’re really not missing out. There are a few funny parts, but the plot is just more over-the-hill Kevin Smith dribble with a few gurgling laughs thanks to an unrecognizably sheered Jason Mewes. The movie’s one redeeming factor is that it features the making of a porn called Star Whores, which leads to a scene in which the characters rehearse a battle with glowing, neon dildos.

Because there’s nothing better than the right combination of sci-fi, porn, and parody, here’s a list of three sexy spoofs from the golden age of both science fiction and sexploitation cinema.

2069: A Sex Odyssey (1974):
Five scantily clad Venutians come to Earth to harvest male “seeds” for use on their apparently semen-starved home planet. Much bumping ensues.

2069: A Sex odyssey

Flesh Gordon (1974):
With the help up Professor Flexi-Jerkoff, nubile football player Flesh Gordon is the only man who can save sex-crazed Earth after evil Emperor Wang blasts the planet with his Sex Ray.

Flesh Gordon

Run, Virgin, Run (1973):
Ok, so maybe it’s a retroactive spoof of Run, Lola, Run‘s title, but the movie’s premise involves a mythical breeze with Viagra-like side affects and a solitary sex god in a small mountain village. What it lacks in thematic relevance, it makes up for in hilariousness.

Run, Virgin, Run

Jean-Claude Van Damme Flies Dogs In Private Jet, Discovers “Planet Moon”

America, f*uck yeah!

Sinewy Belgian “actor” Jean-Claude Van Damme was never famous for his words. The compact martial artist is better known for his ass-kicking skills and pouty-boy Euro look than his, um, wise world view. And, oh how deprived we’ve been!

According to a recent report, Van Damme canceled a series of publicity engagements to care for one of his many adopted dogs. Apparently he has a tendency to pluck stray dogs off the streets of random third-world countries and fly them home in a private jet where he then outfits them with canine-customized wheelchairs. While I’m all for doggie-love, I’m left somewhat befuddled by his following statement:

“My biggest orgasm—not in a sexual way—is to walk with my dogs on the beach. In Belgium we have these wide sidewalks. You feel like you’re on the Planet Moon, and I can make them feel like movie stars.”

I’m sorry, was that “planet moon”? Thanks for the astronomy lesson, JC.

Fanboys On The Road

I did Amidala

After two years of delays—due to increased budgets, edited subplots, celebrity cameo requests, and reshooting—Fanboys is finally on schedule for a February 6, 2009 release date. The movie follows a group of Star Wars-obsessed friends who decide to infiltrate Skywalker Ranch and steal a copy of Episode I: The Phantom Menace in anticipation of the film’s release.

Watch the trailer below and cross your fingers it doesn’t get pushed back again.

Frankenhorror; Or, The Modern Monster

God is dead.

Modern horror was invented in the summer of 1816. Trapped inside on a rainy day, Lord Byron invited his disgruntled companions to each write a ghost story—a challenge that famously spawned Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus and John William Polidori’s less well known The Vampyre, a predecessor to Dracula by more than 80 years. While it’s hard to imagine an uneducated teenage girl and a 21-year-old physician out-writing two of the great Romantic poets (Percy Shelley was also at the scene), the event has become so widely mythologized that it’s difficult to determine who actually wrote what.

The Vampyre was almost immediately met with attribution confusion. The story was published in New Monthly Magazine in 1819 without Polidori’s permission, and, much to his and Byron’s irritation, was falsely advertised as a new work by the famous poet. The credit was later amended, but the issue only hints at the authorial skepticism Frankenstein also met—a debate that continues to this day.

Chronicle Review‘s current article “The Birth of Frankenstein” analyzes the disputed parentage of Frankenstein—a scandalous affair practically fit for Jerry Springer. While the debate leans in favor of Mary, Chronicle‘s comprehensive account walks through the various points of view regarding the story’s evolution.